0227 EXCUSES, EXCUSES

EXCUSES, EXCUSES

“Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.”

I mentioned when introducing Luke that his book contains more of the ethical teachings of Jesus. This chapter and the last couple of chapters is where we find several of those teachings. Here I’d like to explore this one of “excuses.”

We bump someone as we walk past, or make a rude sound, and say, “Excuse me.” It’s a minor request, really. We don’t expect the other person to say, “No!” So when we use the term “excuse me,” it is somewhat less than actually asking for forgiveness. It’s really sort of a command: Excuse me.

The next level for us is to say, “Sorry.” It’s an emotion word, not an actual repentance or request for forgiveness. I’m sorry, you say. I reply, I’m sorry also. Nothing was really gained here if I call your bluff. You are sorry. Especially when your “sorry” statement contains the word “if,” it is really not a repentant apology at all. “I’m sorry if what I did offended you.” It actually casts the blame on you when I say it that way.

Likewise, many times when we do apologize for something big that we did to wrong someone, we include “excuses” as part of our apology. Many times an excuse includes the word “just” to explain that we meant well. We simply had a misunderstanding, or I miscalculated, or someone else caused me to not be able to come through. So I say something like, “Please forgive me. I was just trying to . . ..” When you think about it, it’s also a pretty weak apology, isn’t it?

Jesus told us to let our yes be yes and our no be no. Anything beyond that, he said, is of the evil one. Wow. Likewise, Paul said that it is a “worldly manner” of making decisions when we say “yes yes” and “no no” at the same time. Here’s what I think that often looks like: I say I’ll come to someone’s event, but I really plan to find a reason not to go. I say out loud, “I’d love to go.” But inside, I don’t really want to. So my “yes” is actually a “no.” But I never quite say it that way. Then when the time comes, I provide an excuse, “It’s just that some emergency came up and prevented me from being able to come.” The excuse is blown out of proportion to seem more obstructive than it really was.

Hear these excuses that Jesus says people gave to miss a certain man’s great banquet:

“But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said, ‘I have just bought a field, and I must go and see it. Please excuse me.’

“Another said, ‘I have just bought five yoke of oxen, and I’m on my way to try them out. Please excuse me.’

“Still another said, ‘I just got married, so I can’t come.’

Thinking through it, these are all inflated “emergencies,” wouldn’t you say? Did you say that this very night you MUST go see a field you just bought? The purchase of the oxen took you by surprise, and your inspection is an emergency? Otherwise, of course, you imply that you would be there, because this great banquet is important to you. It’s sort of a weak win/win in the friend world. Sorry that you wasted all that food.

Even the marriage is a weak excuse. Are you saying that you had no idea you were getting married that day? Are you saying it’s only been a month, and you owe your bride more time at home? Or are you blaming HER for you not coming? “I cannot come. I would, but the wife won’t let me.”

Then the owner of the house became angry. He had wasted all that food, and made his honor vulnerable at the hands of these invited guests, and they have thrown him under the bus. He says about his former friends, “I tell you, not one of those who were invited will get a taste of my banquet.’”

We need to treat others with the kind of respect that causes us to be honest and candid. But this parable really has to do with how we respond to the heavenly Father. We excuse ourselves and simply have poor priorities. That disrespect to the Creator of the Universe is unacceptable, once we see it.

Why have I failed to keep my vow to God? How does it sound when I try to say it, in light of these excuses? “Lord, please excuse me.” “I’m sorry if I have sinned against you.” “I would have repented, but I forgot what I was going to change.”

Paul wrote to the Corinthians, “For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.”

Do I want the Lord to say to me, “God bless you.”