0222 JESUS AND SMARTIANS: A RANT

JESUS AND SMARTIANS: A RANT

Luke 9:51-56 When the days drew near for him to be taken up, he set his face to go to Jerusalem. And he sent messengers ahead of him, who went and entered a village of the Samaritans, to make preparations for him. But the people did not receive him, because his face was set toward Jerusalem. And when his disciples James and John saw it, they said, “Lord, do you want us to tell fire to come down from heaven and consume them?” But he turned and rebuked them. And they went on to another village.

There is some important back story to understand in order to appreciate just how offensive this rejection of hospitality from a Samaritan village was. But in order to tell it, perhaps it is best to put this into the voice of the apostle John himself, so that you can hear it in first person. Ready. Here is Boomer John, best friends with Jesus.

We're so...sorry. But we must ask, what is it with Jesus and people from S'marya?

Don't He know that them S'martians ain't real Jews. Then He is hardest on them that are the best Jews. Ten lepers healed by Jesus. Only one returns to thank Him. Care to guess where he's from? 

S’marya.

He tells a story: holy men ignore an injured man, and a despicable S’martian stops to help him. Why make a S’martian the hero of the story? 

I don’t care who you are, “good” and “Samaritan” don’t belong in the same sentence. 

No sir.

What you are about to hear, some may find shocking. But what can I do? It’s what happened, and I’m still trying to wrap my head around it all.

So, Jesus and us is on our way to Jerusalem, The Big City. Going through S’marya, of course. Now, Samaria is that stretch of religious wasteland that stood between Gal'lee County and the Big City of Jerusalem.

And this village in Smarya has the audacity to refuse to offer Him and twelve of his best friends any hospitality! No food. No water. No housing. Just an order to get on through town and don’t stir up no dust on your way out.

We can’t believe it! Being tolerant of our S’martian enemies is one thing. Talking nice about them pagan inbred pig-eaters is another. But Jesus, He seems to think S’martians is actually what God meant when He said to love your neighbor as yourself. 

Okay. I can go there. But when they are the ones who declare themselves the enemy and shoot the first salvo over the bow of the boat, it’s time to call in the Big Guns and let them know a thing or two. 

Them S’martians are rejecting real Jews here. And not just a real Jew, but the Messiah, the Anointed One, the Son of God Himself. 

The Bible says, vengeance is mine, says the Lord. Well, it’s time for God to show that vengeance is His, in my mind. Call down fire from heaven and let God Almighty let them have it with both barrels.

I guess sensitivity to Assyrian wickedness AND that of their cousins in Smarya Runs deep in the blood of a good Gal’lean. But it turns out, us common folk from Gal’lee County was not only ones the receiving end of some pretty unfair prejudices in our day. 

Being judged by them haughty Big City folks from Jerusalem did sting, and we knew that full well. But I was blind to my own sin of dishing out a pre-packaged judgment or two.

(song)

My momma sees a problem in S’marya. 

My daddy says they're all idolaters. 

The northern tribes got wiped out by Assyria.

So there ain't real Jews in S'marya Land no more

S’martians are the worst kind of Gentiles: 

Gentiles who pretend to be Jews!

No good Jew would step into that polluted land

S'martians just ain't good enough for me and you

Hey, Boomer Jim!

Whats that, Boomer John?

What's the difference between goat cheese and a S'martian?

The goat cheese don't smell as bad!

Hahaha!

Hahahaha!

How many S'martians does it take to change a light bub?

None! They all prefer to live in darkness!

Hahahaha!

Hahaha!

S’martians are the worst kind of Gentiles:

Gentiles who pretend to be Jews!

No good Jew would step into that polluted land

S'martians just ain't good enough for me and you

“Mammas don’t let your children grow up to be S’martians.”

S'martians just ain't good enough for me and you

Now remember, children

Look both ways before crossing the street,

and don't you never take no candy from a S'martian.

The way Jesus talks about S'martians, you would almost think that where 

or to whom one was born made no difference at all to Jesus.

What good’s it do to be born Jewish, if that’s the case? You know what I'm saying?

“Mammas don’t let your children grow up to be S’martians.”

S'martians just ain't good enough for me and you

S'martians just ain't good enough for me and 

Turns out, even vengeful prayers ain’t allowed in the Kingdom.

Sometimes I wonder, what good’s it do to be a son of thunder if you don’t get to send a lightning bolt now and then?